Healthy Living Reality

Tag: parenting

  • Late January Reality: Helping Kids and Parents Thrive in the Day-to-Day School Routine

    Late January Reality: Helping Kids and Parents Thrive in the Day-to-Day School Routine

    It may seem like the back-to-school transition after the holidays is over, but any parent knows that the work of parenting never ends. It’s normal for kids to resist morning routines, for homework to feel burdensome, for kids to say they’re bored, and for bedtime to seem like a struggle. On top of it, parents can be exhausted!

    Don’t worry. There are simple hacks for making things smoother during the winter months. If you haven’t already, you can incorporate healthy actions back into the schedule. And, you can break up the day-to-day monotony with fun that doesn’t leave you even more exhausted. It’s all about listening to your kids and framing things in a way that gets through. Here are some tricks to shifting from surviving to thriving this winter. 

    A Post-Holiday “Letdown” Is Normal

    After weeks of excitement and special events over the holidays, they’re now in the distant past. This can be hard for parents, who may have hoped for a break but never got the rest they wanted.

    It can also be hard for kids. It’s hard to transition from November and December, when there may always be a wonderful new adventure to look forward to, to late January. School may feel endless; spring break is far off, and there’s nothing to break the daily routine of school.

    Acknowledge your and your kids’ feelings. They’re valid! Let them know that you understand that it’s hard when special times end, and school comes back. 

    In my family, the end of January feels especially final when it comes to holidays. We not only have the typical winter break over late December and early January. Three of us also have January birthdays. Plus, my parents leave for another country after the third birthday. For these reasons, our family’s transition to late January routine is especially dramatic. 

    Here are some things my son and I talk about.

    • What a wonderful job he did decorating and planning for holiday and birthday parties for the family
    • What he’s been enjoying doing when he hangs out with his friends after school 

    Shift Focus to Smaller Bits of Fun

    You don’t have to accept that the next few months will be boring. Consider coming up with ways to have fun on a smaller scale. What makes them really special is that they may be things you didn’t have time to do over the holidays. 

    A day at the park is simple, but something for kids to look forward to!

    Here are some low-key ways to have fun that my son looks forward to at this time of year.

    • Getting to video chat on weekends with his grandparents
    • Making plans with his amazing, wonderful, and unbelievable babysitter, who only works for us when my parents are out of town
    • Planning for him to sleep over at his grandparents’ house when they return
    • Doing different weekend outings with me that require a car – since we borrow my parents’ car, we don’t go far from home or off a bus route when they’re in town. I don’t like to ask
    • Fun events coming up at school, like a music festival showcasing his classmates in March
    • Going to the library, which has wonderful magnet tiles and other toys, but was closed over winter break

    These simple events can be joyful. Though they fit into the daily routine, they feel like they break it up. 

    Fit in Healthy Habits Now!

    Remember those healthy habits you wanted to start this year? Daily routines are likely to be as predictable and consistent now as at any other time during the year. Your chance to build healthy meals and snacks, regular family activity, and a healthy sleep routine into daily life may be now!

    Cooking healthy foods together can encourage kids to eat healthy, and help them learn what a healthy meal is.

    Small steps can make a big difference. Here are some examples.

    • Shift portions to increase vegetable intake. If kids aren’t eating their vegetables, consider serving smaller amounts of other foods so they’re not full before they get to their vegetables. You can also serve smaller portions of vegetables to avoid overwhelming kids.
    • Make physical activity routine. Enjoy nature walks. Walk to the library or post office. Take a walk while your kids bike or scooter along. 
    • Establish a bedtime routine. You may already do this. If not, make a consistent set of activities you do with your kids before bedtime. Brushing teeth, taking a bath, and reading a story are common ones. You might sing a song or tell a few nursery rhymes together. Make sure to have your own grown-up version of a bedtime routine. It might include brushing teeth, spending time with your significant other (if you have one), packing tomorrow’s lunches, and making a to-do list for the next day.

    What may be the biggest difference for me and my son between the holiday season and routine days of winter is sugar consumption. Christmas candy, irresistible chocolate coins, and birthday cakes contribute added sugars. Furthermore, my son gets a lot of juice and apple cider when my parents are home. They don’t have added sugars, but they do have a lot of sugar. Now we’re back to one reasonable portion of one sugar-sweetened treat a day at home.

    Look for Information, Listen, and Adjust

    If your routine isn’t working, troubleshoot to figure out why not. If kids are cranky or resistant, there’s probably a reason. It’s possible they’re just being difficult, but it’s also possible there’s an underlying barrier, such as fatigue or anxiety. Either way, simple changes can often make a difference.

    Have you tried brushing your teeth together, or singing tooth brushing songs?

    Here are some common reasons why a routine isn’t working, and possible fixes. 

    What Might Be Going OnWhat Can Help
    Kids are tiredAn earlier bedtime can help kids get more total sleep. A consistent bedtime—even on weekends—can prevent starting the school week already short on sleep.
    Kids are overstimulatedAllow 20–30 minutes after school for kids to decompress by amusing themselves however they want (within household rules). Let them know you’re available when they’re ready. Check their schedule to be sure they have at least 30–60 minutes of true downtime each day—unstructured time not dedicated to homework or extracurricular activities.
    Kids want to exert controlOffer choices: “Homework before or after snack?” “Do you want a 5-minute warning or a song timer?” “Do you want to start with reading or math?” Shift from time-based rules to task-based routines. Instead of “It’s 6:30, do your homework,” try “After homework, it’s free time.”

    Turn the dark days of winter into a bright spot with small changes in how you approach your kids and manage schedules. Plus, you can incorporate healthy choices in your family’s daily routine to take advantage of the predictable days that often come in mid-winter.

  • Leading His Own Birthday Party: A Celebratory Way for My Son and His Friends to Transition Back to School

    Leading His Own Birthday Party: A Celebratory Way for My Son and His Friends to Transition Back to School

    My son has a January birthday, so when he requested a kickball game at the park for his party, I knew we’d have to seize the first sunny weekend day that we could. Coincidentally, it turned out to be the Saturday before school resumed after winter break. 

    After a few quiet weeks with family over the holidays, the party turned out to be a beautiful way for the kids to reconnect with each other. It was a wonderful opportunity for me to see his best self: planning, leading, and showing his pride in himself. Also, it reminded me of how positive and supporting our community is. 

    Kids love balloons, and a “9” balloon was a requirement!

    The Request: A Kickball Birthday Party

    My son knows what he wants. He often has very good instincts. This year, he told me he wanted to play kickball at his birthday party. He wanted throw-down bases, red and white wristbands to identify teams, and Gatorade. Beyond that, he was flexible. 

    Since it was a party in the park and therefore low-cost (relatively), I let him invite as many friends as he wanted. That was 20, plus siblings. It’s a lot, but I figured that pizza is cheap. We’d be able to afford it. 

    Planning, Purchasing, and Preparing

    Since these kids play together at school and after school for hours at a time, I was confident that the party didn’t have to be too structured. They’d have plenty to do, even if they didn’t make it to the kickball game. They could amuse themselves on the playground if needed. 

    Here’s the run-down of the shopping list. 

    • Blank white baseball caps and cloth pens for the kids to decorate
    • Red and white wristbands, to be numbered and passed out according to when a child was picked (the first player to be picked on the red team got a red #1, etc.)
    • Pizza. Lots of pizza. Thanks to Little Caesar’s for their 2 for $10 deal on large pizzas. 
    • A set of throw-down bases, and an extra kickball
    • Cakes. Lots of cakes. 4 round cakes from a supermarket.
    • Gatorade, water, Kool-Aid, chips, and peanuts. The Gatorade and peanuts were, of course, in honor of the athletes. 

    The baseball caps and wristbands were the party favors.

    Of course, even when a kid runs a party “himself,” the parent and the rest of the village offer support. I borrowed my parents’ car, loaded it up the evening before, and left it at my parents’ house that night. They met me at the park the next morning so I could unload, and they picked up the pizza and brought it to the park. Thank you!

    Meanwhile, my son and our neighbor and friend bought helium balloons and set up at the park. I couldn’t do it without her – thank you!

    Moment of Truth: The Party Was a Blast!

    As guests arrived, I showed them where they could decorate hats and help themselves to snacks and drinks, and pointed out where my son and other guests were playing on the playground. They played happily for about 30 minutes, and I thought they might be so happy that they wouldn’t play kickball. 

    Kids love playing with friends, so I knew they’d be happy in a park with pizza and snacks!

    Suddenly, due to some unknown trigger, they descended on the pizza and sat at the tables – maybe just like they do at school! Just as suddenly, they got up, went to the grass, put the throw-down plate, bases, and pitcher’s rubber where they wanted, and picked teams. 

    They ended up with an 8-on-8 game, meaning red and white wristband numbers 1 through 8 were used. There was no arguing, just a process for picking, presumably picking the way they do every day at school. 

    Simple bases made for a fun game.

    Kickball started. They played for a solid hour, including a kindergartener and a fifth-grader. Nobody ended up in tears; they seemed very happy! They came to agreements on foul balls, outs, and runs scored. 

    Selfishly, I enjoyed sitting back, chatting with friendly parents, and watching my son lead and interact with his friends. He enjoyed every second of his event, and it looked like the other children did, too. 

    The cakes were simple, but popular!

    An hour later, I told my son it was time for cake. He announced that the game was over, and everyone came to the table. Then kids either stayed to play less formal games, or left. I cleaned up. 

    Another Birthday Party: A Rare Moment of Success as a Parent

    Birthday parties are stressful. They come with a lot of pressure, as you want to please your child as the top priority. There are also struggles with budget, with making sure the other kids are happy, and with having enough to do. 

    Every time I pull one off, it’s a relief. It’s also a moment of pride because it feels like I did right by my son – everyone deserves the birthday party they want!

    Further, I love watching my son succeed, and this party felt like one of his good successes.

    • I saw how much his friends respect him.
    • He was spot on for the important parts, like knowing that the kids wanted Gatorade and chips.
    • He may have said “thank you” to me. Okay, that’s taking it too far. 

    It turned out to be a great way to transition back to school. His mind went back to thinking about how much he loves playing with his friends, and that probably made it easier to get him out the door on Monday morning.

  • Transition Back to School: Last-Minute Tips to Reset Sleep and Schedules for Parents and Kids

    Transition Back to School: Last-Minute Tips to Reset Sleep and Schedules for Parents and Kids

    Did your family’s schedule shift while kids were off from school? That is common! But when school starts up again, it’s time to get up early, arrive at school on time, make it to afterschool activities, and finish homework in the evening – while saving time for badly needed daily downtime. 

    These are some common changes that need to happen. 

    • Go to bed earlier and get up earlier
    • Be more organized so mornings are less hectic, and evenings include homework time
    • Plan meals so they’re more predictable and balanced
    • Manage emotions of kids who may be tired, wish they could continue to have extra family time like they did during vacation, and feel pressure to perform well or behave well at school

    These may sound like a lot, but they’re necessary. Kids thrive on predictability and routine. It makes them feel safe, not to mention it help them get enough sleep, eat well, and learn better.

    Busy parents thrive on routine, too. Without planning, how else can you get it all done if you’re working, parenting, housekeeping, and trying to stay healthy? Schedules let you get enough sleep, get more done, and support your kids while you stress less.

    There may be a lot to think about, but it’s possible to re-establish a daily schedule that works for your family. You have a head start if you get your routine back a few days early, but even if school’s already started, there are things you can do to ease the transition. Here are some tips for getting enough sleep, and completing necessary tasks, without too much stress. Plus, you can learn what to watch for when looking for warning signs that your kids may need extra help. 

    Resetting Sleep After a School Break (Or After Going Back to School)

    First, forgive yourself. It’s common for kids to go to bed later and get up later during breaks. Ideally, shift the schedule back by 10-20 minutes a day, starting a few days before school starts. 

    If school’s already starting – or already started – and you didn’t shift sleep schedules back, don’t worry about it. Just have your kids get up on time the morning that school starts, and bedtime will follow naturally. 

    Use a bedtime routine to help kids get ready for sleep.

    Here are a couple of key points to remember. 

    • Kids are generally more resilient than adults. Waking up at what may seem like an impossibly early hour for you may not even feel early to them.
    • Kids follow your lead. If you act cool about it, they’re likely to follow suit. If you apologize and give them an opening to complain about it, they probably will. 
    • Distraction helps. Try waking them up and guiding them through morning routines to a special breakfast that they look forward to before getting everyone out the door. 

    Planning a Consistent Daily Schedule That’s Complete But Not Overfull

    To create a daily schedule, identify your anchor times first. These are times that you are unable to change and that you must accommodate. For families with kids, these times likely include school drop-off, school pick-up, and any afterschool events. If you’re working defined hours, the start and finish of your work day may also be anchor times. 

    From the anchor times, add in these additional events in your schedule.

    • Wake time: determined by how long you need to get up, get ready, and get out the door
    • Bedtime: Count back the number of hours from the wake time to determine bedtime
    • Bedtime routine: Starts 30-60 minutes before bedtime
    • Dinner time: Starts 3-4 hours before bedtime, or when everyone gets home from school, activities, and work

    To help yourself and your kids, consider writing out the schedule and posting it on the fridge or somewhere else where everyone can see it. Even kids who can’t yet read or understand the concept may take comfort in knowing that there’s a schedule to be followed. 

    Work together with kids to pack up the night before so everyone’s prepared to leave on time in the morning.

    Protect Downtime for Kids and Parents in a Busy Schedule

    Be sure to include downtime in your schedule. Kids need it, and you need it. Even if it takes the place of a formal activity here and there, it may do more good than packing another activity into the routine. Downtime lets kids and parents reduce stress, which lets them perform better and be happier and healthier. 

    Younger kids may need your guidance during down time. Activities to do together might include reading, playing games, building with blocks, or coloring. Some children don’t like to stop moving; those kids might like to play games like rolling a ball back and forth or building a pillow fort.

    Older kids might let you know what they want for downtime. They might want to be completely on their own, reading or watching a movie. They might want to hang out with you. Or, they might want to do something on their own, but have you in the room for company. 

    Set aside time for low-key family time.

    Remember to protect your own “me” time! If “relaxing” with your kids doesn’t feel so relaxing, save a different time period during the day for your own relaxation time by yourself or with your spouse. It can be during the day when kids are at school, or after the kids go to bed. 

    Starting Slow and Catching Up on Weekends

    Do you find it hard to get back to work after a break or vacation? Similarly, kids can struggle to get back into the swing of things at school. Consider setting aside extra time for homework in case it feels harder than it did before break. Be there to encourage kids, and try to recognize signs that they’re simply too tired to complete the assignment. If necessary, contact the teacher to ask for a later due date.

    Weekends can offer a great time to catch up on sleep and mental recovery. Let your whole family sleep as late as needed to make up for any lost sleep from early weekday mornings, but don’t let weekend bedtimes shift more than 30-60 minutes later than weekday bedtimes. Also take advantage of weekends for catching up on down time, family time, and outdoors time. These all help with mental health and a smoother transition back to school. 

    Keep in mind that going back to school shouldn’t be too traumatic for parents or kids. If something seems unreasonably difficult, or you notice persistent fatigue or mood changes in yourself or your kids, seek help. Ask your children’s pediatrician, call a mental health crisis line or parent stress line, or contact the school for more support.

    With some planning and strategizing, going back to school can let kids get back to learning and friends, and let you get back to having some non-parenting time.

  • More Parent-Tested, Lifestyle Coach-Approved Tips for Staying Healthy During Winter Break: Immunity, Sleep, Schedules, and Screens

    More Parent-Tested, Lifestyle Coach-Approved Tips for Staying Healthy During Winter Break: Immunity, Sleep, Schedules, and Screens

    Winter break is a pause from the usual routine. For parents, differences at this time of year may include kids being home from school, prep for holidays and holiday events, and challenges like working during school closures, getting sick, or traveling in winter weather. 

    Unfortunately, winter break often means straying from healthy habits. The first post in this series talked about eating well, staying active, and hydrating during winter break. We also talked about maintaining mental health by establishing priorities and sticking to them. This post talks about supporting health with immune support, daily structure, healthy sleep, and responsible screen time. It’s worth it to take a few steps to support health during this winter break!

    Supporting Immune Health During Winter Break

    Winter break falls within peak cold and flu season, and COVID-19 is still a threat. Travel and gatherings like holiday parties and family reunions can increase the spread. 

    Here are simple tips to boost your immunity and reduce the spread of infections. 

    Washing hands is easy and effective.

    • Wash your hands properly before eating, after using the bathroom, and when coming back inside after going out.
    • Get recommended vaccines, such as for the flu and COVID-19.
    • Consume plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables for vitamin C and other nutrients.
    • Stay hydrated with water, tea, or other low-calorie beverages. 
    • Get enough sleep and physical activity.
    • Wear a mask when around others. 

    Remember to assess risk before attending gatherings. If you or someone in your household is at higher risk for more serious illnesses, consider wearing masks or skipping the event. Similarly, be considerate if you’re planning to visit higher-risk individuals like grandparents. Inform them if you or your children are ill, and let them decide whether they still want you to come or if they want you to mask up. 

    Keep in mind that most colds aren’t serious. Kids are likely to get sick sometimes, just like grown-ups. Contact your child’s pediatrician if you have concerns. 

    Sleep: An Underrated Winter Break Health Habit

    Parents already know that sleep is critical for mood and behavior; tired children are no fun to manage. Sleep also boosts immunity, energy, and ability to think. Winter break is a great time to get more sleep for several reasons. 

    • It’s easier to set aside time for a bedtime routine when kids aren’t swamped with homework.
    • Days are shorter, so it gets dark earlier in the evening and stays dark later in the morning – perfect for sleeping!
    • There’s more ability to sleep in when you’re not rushing to gather kids, clothes, lunches, and homework, and get them off to school on time. 

    For best results, keep bedtime to within an hour of bedtime during the school year. That makes it easier to go back to school without causing sleep deprivation. Sticking to a consistent sleep schedule also makes it easier to get to sleep and fall asleep, so it’s easier to get adequate high-quality sleep. 

    Also maintain habits like turning off screens at least 30 minutes before bed, having a bedtime routine that’s consistent, and being active during the day so kids are ready to sleep at night. 

    Maintaining a Loose Daily Schedule Without Over-Scheduling

    Winter break offers the chance to be less strict with your schedule. You don’t have to drop the kids off early at school. They may not have certain after-school activities to attend. Work hours may be less rigid. 

    Plan to eat meals together at a consistent time, and the rest of your daily schedule can fall into place more easily.

    With extra flexibility, it can be tempting to let go of a schedule completely, but that can be a mistake. While some people perceive schedules as limiting, I like to think of them as liberating. Here’s why having a set schedule can be liberating.

    • It reduces decision fatigue because you’ve already decided when many events – like meals and bedtime – will occur.
    • It gives you control over your time because it lets you set aside time for what’s important to you, such as work, specific events, working out, and family time.
    • It lets offers kids predictability and stability, which lets kids thrive and feel secure
    • It lets kids see that you’ve set aside time for what they want, like screen time or play time

    To create a schedule that doesn’t make you feel trapped, start with a few anchor events to establish and maintain a daily rhythm. They may include:

    • Bedtime (and a bedtime routine before that)
    • Meal times
    • Outdoor times 
    • Nap time (if you have younger children)

    Depending on your needs and the ages of your children, other items in the daily schedule may include reading time, screen time, family play time, and quiet individual play time (when you can work if needed). 

    See how your schedule works for a few days, then tweak it if needed. 

    Screen Time: Set Boundaries That Actually Work

    Each family has different norms around screen time: how much, when, and what’s okay to do or watch. Ipads and other tablets, laptops, phones, and smart watches are abundant in most households nowadays, and they act like kid magnets. 

    Tablets can give parents a needed break while traveling, and it’s a time when kids are sedentary anyway.

    During vacation, it’s important to set boundaries that meet your needs. Usually, there’s a conflict between parents wanting to reduce kids’ screen time versus kids wanting to watch more and parents needing a way to entertain kids without them. 

    When you set boundaries for screen time, consider these aspects. 

    • How many hours are okay per day or week. 
    • Which device(s) your child will have access to.
    • Which guardrails you’ll put in place, such as supervising your child during screen time, using the device together with your child, or activating a child mode on the device. 
    • What your child may do with the device, such as doing educational programs, playing interactive games, or watching videos. 

    Whatever rules you set, stick to them just like you stick to any other rules in your household. Here are some rules you might consider. 

    • A maximum of two hours of screen time a day.
    • No screen time until after a certain amount of active time and reading or other educational activity.
    • The child must get your approval for each new activity, such as a new game or video.
    • The child must take vision and active breaks every 30 minutes, like running around the house for 1-2 minutes without looking at a screen. 

    All screens should be turned off for the bedtime routine. 

    Keep in mind that everyone needs a break – maybe even you. If the only way you can get a break and prevent a breakdown is to give your child more screen time, it’s okay. They’ll survive, and you need to, too. 

    Winter break and the holidays can be both happy and healthy, but it can take some planning and tricks to make it happen. How do you stay healthy during this time? 

  • Winter Break Reality: Balancing Work, Kids, Holidays, and Rest When School Is Out

    Winter Break Reality: Balancing Work, Kids, Holidays, and Rest When School Is Out

    Winter break is starting – and somehow, the thought of schools being closed for three weeks isn’t as exciting for me as a parent as it was for me as a kid. There is still a lot to be excited about, such as the end of Hanukkah and extra time with a kid who isn’t burdened with homework, spelling tests, and maximizing his Friday Free Time in third grade. 

    But many parents may agree with me that a break from school leads to personal challenges. It can be hard to juggle parenting, working, health, and, often, expectations around holidays. At the same time, this is theoretically the time of year we’re supposed to recharge for the year to come. 

    I don’t have a solution for getting all my work done, entertaining my child while keeping him from watching a screen, staying active, attending all holiday events, and starting the new year feeling rested. If that’s your idea of a successful winter break, I don’t know how to get you there. But if you’re like me in setting more realistic goals for a successful break, keep reading for strategies.

    Double Duty on Winter Break

    As a single working parent, I am facing three weeks of working while my son is home from school. For me, that translates to 11 working days and 4 vacation days (Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year’s Eve, and New Year’s Day). That leaves 11 work days for me to parent an active boy in the home while meeting work deadlines. 

    The idea of spending more time with my son is nice. He’ll be more relaxed without feeling pressure that he puts on himself when school’s in session to behave well, follow directions, study hard, and do his best. He’ll love extra time with his grandparents (my parents). These will hopefully translate into more pleasant time with me – and he is wonderful company when he’s in a good mood! 

    But it’s tricky getting work done when he’s around. The only way I’ve found to concentrate on work when he’s at home is to let him watch a device. It’s not healthy for his body or mind, and it makes me feel guilty. So, it’s time to juggle. 

    • Which work-related tasks can I complete while talking to him – that is, which tasks don’t require full attention?
    • Which tasks can I squeeze in if we go to the park and I can get him to play for a few minutes by himself – for example, is there anything I can work on using my phone, and can I do any thinking while we’re walking to the park so that if I have a few minutes to work while at the park, I can type furiously?
    • What tricks can I come up with to have him do some sort of task on his own before he starts watching YouTube?

    It’s tough – but thankfully, there are fewer meetings at work, so I can mostly focus on doing essential tasks. 

    Keeping Kids Happy: Benefits and Compromises

    The obvious benefit of schools being closed is getting to spend more time with my son. There are sides of my son and parts of his day that I don’t usually get to see. I get to see his more relaxed self that’s not thinking about homework or who gets to be up first in kickball or whether he’ll get to have two pieces of pizza instead of just one at lunch. I love his excitement for things like upcoming holidays and extra time with my parents.

    On the flip side, there’s more time to fill. It’s harder to keep him away from a screen, especially if I don’t feel like spending all day, every day focused on him – or if I simply can’t because of work or other priorities. 

    One of my main strategies for keeping my son content, getting my essential work done, and staying a little bit sane are to define the time periods. Here are some examples. 

    • Quality time together: If we’re dedicating time to each other, I make sure we’re doing something that involves interaction or focus. For example, we can play cards together, play catch or another sport, or do an art project. 
    • Relaxed time at home. We may be in the same room, but I’ve let him know that he can enjoy his free time and activities, and I will be doing mine. We may talk periodically.
    • “Alone” time. There may be times when I need to concentrate, such as if I am writing a piece or doing calculations. I ask my son to wait for a few minutes before talking to me. I try not to do this too much when he’s home, but sometimes it’s necessary. 

    Holidays with Kids: “Good Enough” Is Probably “Great”

    Kids love special occasions. They bring their own joy, excitement, and ideas. While you may have an image of a “perfect” holiday, keep in mind that whatever happens on the holiday will probably be great in their eyes. 

    It probably doesn’t matter what you make or do together – as long as it’s pleasant, it serves the holiday purpose.

    Here are a few ways to support holidays that are easier on parents and magical for kids. Keep in mind that all children and families are different, so adopt these tips to fit your own situation. 

    • Involve them in holiday prep, from decorating your home’s interior and exterior, to wrapping gifts, to mixing batter for cookies. If their “help” slows you down too much, give them tasks that are separate from yours, like placing spoonfuls of batter on a baking pan while you mix the batter for the next batch of cookies.
    • Let them lead, even if they do it differently than you would have done it. For example, let them create a holiday playlist that has very little to do with the holiday you’re celebrating, choose a gift that you wouldn’t have chosen for that person, or distribute Valentine’s Day napkins at a Christmas dinner. They’re participating and feeling included and loved, and that’s what’s important. 
    • Give your children jobs. They may be the event photographer, DJ, escort for guests, set-up crew, or all of those. Kids tend to rise to the challenge, especially if they get to tell guests how important their jobs are. 
    Let your children be leaders and experts – even if they want to show you that they learned dreidel in school, but you’re not Jewish!

    As much as possible, be a good role model. Be happy and accepting. Express gratitude and excitement when you receive a gift. Show how much fun you have when you select the perfect gift to give. Above all, make it clear that you are pleased with the holiday, and thankful to be with your family. 

    Resting Up for the New Year

    How can you rest with work, parenting, and holidays happening all at once? It’s important to give yourself a mental break. Cut yourself slack on things like rigid schedules, perfectly balanced homemade meals, and screen time for your kids. If they skip a chore, let it go. Arguing with them may take more effort than it’s worth. Simply telling yourself that it’s okay to loosen up for a couple of weeks can make a huge difference in the amount of stress you feel. 

    For some physical rest, delay or skip non-essential tasks. Clean the house less often, let holiday decorations stay up for a few extra days or weeks (except for a potentially dangerous dried-out Christmas tree, which can be a fire hazard). Wear casual clothes instead of dressing up, and limit your planned commitments. Cutting a few corners here and there can add up to a well-deserved break. 

    Holidays can be both magical and difficult for parents, but you can take steps to get what you need while your children are out of school. Set your priorities, do only what’s necessary to accomplish the bare minimum, and maintain a positive attitude. You can start the new year feeling closer to your kids, refreshed, and on top of things at work.

  • Eat Well and Keep Moving: Simple Parent-Tested Tips for Healthy Living During Winter Break

    Eat Well and Keep Moving: Simple Parent-Tested Tips for Healthy Living During Winter Break

    Winter break brings a different pace to family life as schools close and schedules change. Childcare duties increase and holidays may bring extra responsibilities, but working parents may not have much time off. Minds and bodies still need care, so it’s a good time to take a practical and creative approach to staying healthy. 

    In winter weather, amid holiday cheer, and with tired, bored, or excited children, it can be even more rewarding to cling to healthy habits. Here are tips for staying active for parents and kids, eating healthy without excess costs or fights, getting outside time in any (safe) weather, and hydrating for health.. 

    Keeping Parent and Child Active During Winter Break

    Staying active is imperative for physical and mental health, but it can take extra planning during winter break even if it’s a habit during other times. During these weeks, we can be busier, schedules can be different, and weather can be rainy where I live. However, we can overcome these challenges with prioritization. Bodies need to move!

    Fortunately, I’ve been running for almost 30 years. It’s enough of a habit now that I know it’ll get done during break, too. It’s built into my day, from making sure I go to bed early enough to be rested by morning run time, to having child care lined up every morning, 6 days a week. 

    It takes a bit more thought to make sure my son gets enough exercise. He’s not lazy – he’s the opposite of it! – but it takes more planning to get him active than for me to run. When school is in session, he walks to and from school, plays a bit at recess and lunch, and plays for hours in the afterschool care program. 

    On break, here are some ways he stays active most days.

    • Yardwork and gardening with my parents at their house in the mornings while I run and take “me” or work time.
    • Various ball games with my parents in their backyard, including football, soccer, baseball, and creative variations of these. 
    • Walks and bike rides with me to any destination I can think of to make him interested enough to come alone without too much protest. A park, a store, the library, and a bus stop or metro station are common destinations. 
    • Walking to the park (about 15 minutes each way) for kickball, catch, or football.
    With the right gear, kids can get plenty of outside time in most kinds of weather.

    Rainy day options include these.

    • Dressing properly, mentally preparing to be cold and wet, and playing outside in mud and puddles with the thought of a warm shower and dry clothes when we come inside.
    • Going to our building’s underground parking garage for roller skating, a game of catch, or various other adventures. 
    • Playing in our building’s rec room/gym.

    Healthy Eating for All During Winter Break

    Health eating for the family can be challenging during winter break. Depending on your child’s habits and location, you may be used to schools providing milk, breakfast, lunch, and snacks. During break, you’re responsible for all food and beverages. It may be an extra responsibility for you, but see if you can turn mealtimes into a chance to spend more time together that you don’t get when your child eats lunch at school. 

    Thankfully, most kids prefer simple, familiar meals, so take advantage. Plain whole-wheat pasta with marinara sauce, chicken or parmesan cheese, and a piece of fruit can be a balanced, easy, and welcome dinner, for example. For lunch, try items as simple as PB & fruit sandwiches on whole-wheat tortillas. Don’t sweat it!

    Here are some tips for healthy meals for everyone. 

    • It’s okay to repeat meals. Kids often love repetition. 
    • Keep serving vegetables and fruit at most meals. 
    • Try these ideas for healthy breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and snacks. 

    Take shortcuts whenever you can get away with it to make healthy eating easier. Here are some examples. 

    • Make double or triple batches so there are leftovers to eat the next day or two. 
    • Use frozen foods like fish fillets, chicken tenderloins or breasts, vegetables, and berries to reduce pressure to shop frequently. 
    • Stock up on easy-to-use nutritious panty items like whole-wheat pasta, plain instant oatmeal, canned tomato sauce, peanut butter, and mixed nuts.
    • Make soups, stews, and casseroles with vegetables and lean proteins. They’re easy to make and easy to freeze.
    • Sandwiches are just fine for meals – use whole-grain bread, peanut butter or low-fat cheese, and a side of fruit or vegetables. 
    Whole-wheat spaghetti, turkey meatballs, marinara sauce, and parmesan cheese: dinner is ready!

    Holiday treats can feel stressful if you’re worried that your kids will eat too much fat and sugar or replace nutritious foods with holiday treats. To reduce anxiety and avoid fights, I suggest letting your kids eat treats at holiday events and parties. 

    Support healthy eating the rest of the time by having healthy foods in the home. Have healthy snacks always available so hungry kids will eat healthy, and keep your children eating at the table, not while watching a screen. In other words, have foods like fresh grapes, grape tomatoes, string cheese, and plain popcorn in the house, and keep chips, cookies, and candy out of the house. 

    Outdoor Time in All (Safe) Weather

    Did you know it’s okay to be outside in most weather? And that it has a wide range of benefits? Here are some reasons why it’s important to be outside. 

    • Getting natural light helps you sleep better because it helps your body set its natural circadian rhythm to be awake during the day and sleepy at night.
    • Being outside counts as being in nature, even if the only bit of nature you can see is a sliver of sky or a weed growing from a crack in a sidewalk. Nature improves mood and health. 
    • Being outside encourages movement because there’s more space. 

    It’s usually safe to be outside in winter except in any of the following conditions. 

    • The temperature with wind chill (“feels like”) is under 0°F (-18°C). 
    • There is a blizzard or whiteout conditions. 
    • Freezing rain or excessive ice makes the ground slippery. 
    • Thunderstorms are in the area. 

    For cold weather, be sure to layer up and watch for signs of hypothermia or frostnip. A warm jack like a lined puffer jacket can be a great outer layer for kids and adults. Add a hat and gloves or mittens for more warmth. 

    If it’s raining, but not freezing rain or with high winds, dress well and enjoy the puddles in the rain! A stylish and functional pair of yellow boots can keep kids happy and splashing. Kids seem to love umbrellas, too. Wear a waterproof rain jacket, and adults and kids alike can get some fresh air before coming indoors for a hot shower and some soup or tea.

    Hydration

    It’s easy to forget hydration, but it can help everyone’s energy and mood. Remember to drink often, even in cold weather. Kids are especially likely to ignore or miss thirst cues. 

    Any of these are good options. 

    • Water
    • Herbal tea
    • Broth
    • Tea with milk, which is an especially good choice for adding protein and calcium
    Make hot decaf coffee or tea with milk together for family time, hydration, and fun.

    It’s okay to relax during vacation, but it’s also a good idea to stay healthy. A bit of planning can make it easier for you and your family to be active, eat well, and feel better so you can get more joy from the season.

  • Nutritionist-Approved Tips to Get Your Picky Eater Try New Foods with Less Stress

    Nutritionist-Approved Tips to Get Your Picky Eater Try New Foods with Less Stress

    If you’re frustrated that your picky eater won’t try new foods, you’re a pretty normal parent. Picky eating affects 1 in 5 children – or more, when you consider that some kids go through phases of picky eating. It can lead to worries on your part that your child may not get needed nutrition, and it can cause stress at meals. But you can manage the situation with less stress, begging, and worrying. 

    As with many health behaviors, small changes and consistency are key. We’ll go over patterns in picky eating, causes, and concerns. Then we’ll get to strategies for overcoming it as a team. The result may be a kid who’s more adventurous with foods, and a parent – you! – who’s calmer and less stressed. This post has a brief overview, and we’ll dive deeper into each topic in future posts. Let’s go!

    Remember to ask your child’s pediatrician if you have any concerns about behaviors, eating behaviors, or nutrition. 

    What’s “Picky Eating?”

    Picky eating is also called choosy eating, fad eating, and choosy eating, according to an article in Appetite. Kids with picky eating may refuse new foods, only eat a limited variety of foods, or have very strong food preferences. Signs that picky eating can be a problem include:

    • Your child only eats 10-15 “safe” foods.
    • Your child gets upset if a new food is on her plate.
    • Meals become battles over food choices.
    • Your child avoids entire food groups, such as vegetables or dairy products.

    These are warning signs, though they don’t automatically mean your child has a nutritional problem. 

    Balancing “Safe” Foods with “New” Foods Consistently

    You need to give your child a variety of new foods to expand the variety of foods they’ll eat, but it’s important to do so gradually. At the same time, keep “safe” foods as the main foods on their plates to avoid pressuring them. 

    Give Them Healthy Options

    Some picky eaters are picky because they can be. That is, they consistently have access to specific types of kid-favorite foods, like bagels, cereal, pasta, chips, and pizza. Not surprisingly, they refuse to eat other types of foods, like vegetable stir fry, fish, and yogurt. 

    It’s important to remember that kids will eat when they are hungry enough. If your kids are always given the chance to fill up on cookies, fries, and ice cream, they will. If your kids are hungry and are offered nutrient-dense choices like fresh fruit, vegetables, and beans, there’s a good chance they’ll start to enjoy those foods more. 

    By now, I’ve learned to carry fresh fruit with me along with other snacks for my son. I offer the fruit first because I found that if he eats other snacks first, he’ll refuse the fruit. Once the fruit is eaten, he’s welcome to other snacks. 

    Tangerines are kid-friendly and nutritious. Try serving fruit before other snacks to add variety.

    Keep It Low-Key

    This tip may be hardest to follow because it’s telling you to act exactly opposite to the way you may be feeling. You may be desperate for your child to eat something new and for meals to pass without a fight, but that’s more likely to happen if you play it cool. 

    Simply serve the meal or snack, including small amounts of new or varied foods, without putting pressure. Make one meal for the whole family, making sure to include enough “safe” foods for your kids to feel comfortable. Remember that you’re a role model and your children are always watching you. If you eat and enjoy new foods, they will understand the concept, and likely eventually do the same. 

    Keep Things in Perspective

    Remember that most kids in the US are not at risk for severe malnutrition. Talk to your children’s pediatrician if you’re concerned. There may be options for supplemental energy or protein shakes, or for multivitamin and mineral supplements, to prevent specific deficiencies. If your child’s doctor is reassuring that your child is not in imminent danger due to food patterns, try to relax. Things will fall into place eventually. 

    Repeated Exposure Helps

    An unfamiliar food starts to become familiar if children keep seeing it on the table and on their plate. Consistently offer the new food, keeping in mind that it can take dozens of tries for a taste test to happen, and dozens of taste tests before your child actually likes the food. Just like with most other aspects of parenting, it takes patience. 

    If your child likes plain pasta, try adding a bite of tomatoes for a few weeks.

    Introduce the Food in a Personal Way

    Say matter of factly what the food is and what it tastes like. If possible, tie that food or ingredient to something they enjoyed in another setting. My son, for example, has learned to love sushi and taste spicy foods because his friends do both of those. 

    Give Your Kids Ownership

    Let your kids decide how to eat new foods. For example, if your target food is tomatoes, give them choices. Grape tomatoes for snacks, cherry tomatoes on skewers with mozzarella, sliced tomatoes in sandwiches, canned tomatoes, sauce on pizza, and sauce on pasta are all different ways to enjoy tomatoes. Let your child choose his favorite textures, flavors, and accompaniments. 

    For example, my son thought he didn’t like basil until he tried it from his school garden. Since then, he enjoys it because it’s personal to him – and his first choice for eating it is in pesto, which is how he ate it at school (read about it here).

    Pizza is one vehicle for healthy ingredients. Load it with tomato sauce and cheese for veggies, protein, and calcium.

    How Long Will It Take?

    It depends, but it can take a while! After several weeks, your children may be more willing to smell or taste a new food. Within a shorter timeframe, you may be able to have fewer mealtime fights if you keep it relaxed and stop pressuring your children. If it gets to the point where things are getting worse or you’re feeling out of control, seek help. 

    Stay tuned for future posts going into more depth on managing picky eaters, keeping worries down, and introducing new foods without food fights. 

  • How I Get My Son to Eat a Variety of Foods – Try These Top Tips with Your Picky Eater

    How I Get My Son to Eat a Variety of Foods – Try These Top Tips with Your Picky Eater

    Are any of your kids picky eaters? If you’re a parent of a picky eater, you’re not alone. About 1 in 5 kids in elementary school are picky eaters. But take heart. Picky eating can be frustrating, but it’s not likely to become a health crisis. Plus, there are things you can do to help your child overcome picky eating. 

    Here’s how I try to get my son, age 8, to eat a variety of foods for a balanced diet while I stay calm. As a nutritionist and single parent, here’s what I use. These tips, backed by expert recommendations and experience.

    Spoiler alert: it’s probably going to turn out just fine. 

    Most important is to keep eating times lighthearted and enjoyable.

    Tip: Have Healthy Foods Nearby

    I’ve seen countless parents tell me their children are picky eaters, but I also see them offering their kids junk food. Once I went with my son to his friend’s house for a playdate. The child had been labeled a “picky eater.” There was a tidy kitchen, with a pizza box on the counter. That afternoon, the boys ate from that pizza box, and served themselves ice cream and soda from the freezer and fridge. 

    I wonder whether the child would be more likely to eat other foods if other foods were more available and appealing than the pizza, soda, and ice cream at that house. What if there were grape tomatoes on the counter, cheese sticks and grapes in the fridge, and peanuts in the pantry? Might the child be more prone to eating those nutritious foods? 

    Tip: Prioritize Hunger at Meals

    I know several children who always seem to be eating when I see them. Their parents tell me that they’re fussy eaters and don’t eat foods like vegetables, fruit, and dairy products. 

    Kids will eat when they’re hungry. They may appear to be bottomless pits when it comes to snacking, but if they eat too many snacks, their appetite can disappear at mealtimes. That leaves them low on nutrients and variety if their typical snack foods are crackers, chips, and granola bars. 

    Try to offer more nutritious snacks first, like berries, tangerines, baby carrots, and unsweetened brown rice cakes. If they’re that hungry, they’ll eat. If they’re not that hungry, there’s no need to encourage snacking on sugary or fatty snack foods. 

    Tip: Keep Portions Small

    I’ve made the mistake of serving my son oversized portions. He ends up eating none of what I served him, even if it is something he loves. It turns out that he’s intimidated. 

    Offer small portions of a variety of nutritious foods and see what kids choose!

    Keep portions small so kids feel that they are manageable. Even if the plate looks underfull to you, it can look more welcoming for kids. Plus, you can always serve more if they want. 

    Tip: Introduce New Foods Gradually

    Keeping portions small is even more important when introducing new foods. Start with an almost imperceptibly small amount. For example, if your child only likes plain white pasta, try mixing in a teaspoon of tomato sauce before serving it. It will be almost impossible to taste. Gradually increase the amount over weeks.

    Sticking with the pasta example, you can expand a kid’s love for plain pasta to a tolerance for whole grains. Swap about an eighth of their pasta for whole-wheat pasta. Over the course of weeks, gradually increase this amount. 

    The point here is for the child to realize that she can tolerate, and maybe even enjoy, the new food. 

    Tip: Let Your Kids Take Charge

    Many kids love having control. It makes sense, since adults make most of the decisions that affect their lives, from when to get up, what clothes are available to them, what they do during the day, and what they can watch on a screen. Give children control of something fun, personal, and important – their food!

    Let your kids bring a friend to the meal to help them eat a variety of foods.

    The sky isn’t quite the limit (I’m not suggesting that you let them choose an ice cream sundae for dinner with cupcakes for dessert). Try letting your kids work within guidelines that you set. For example, tell them they can choose a vegetable, a fruit, a grain, and a protein for dinner, and see what they come up with. 

    Here are some examples: 

    • Whole-grain pasta with marinara sauce, a yogurt, and strawberries
    • A whole-grain bagel with peanut butter, raisins, and a V8. 
    • Plain Cheerios with milk, a banana, and a squeeze pack of fruit-veggie mix. 

    A variation is to let your children choose from a menu that you provide. The more control they have, the more they are likely to eat what they choose. 

    Tip: Model How You Want Them to Eat

    When you are eating from the pizza box on the counter, what do you think your kids will want? Probably pizza, not a salad. When you go out for Chinese food, are you ordering fried rice, chow mein noodles, and sweet and sour chicken? Or are you opting for chicken with broccoli, mixed vegetable stir fry, and brown rice?

    Modeling may be the most important tool we have as parents. It may also be the toughest, since it’s easier to live by, “Do as I say, not as I do.” It may also be slow to get results from modeling. But it’s likely to lead to the longest-lasting effects. 

    When kids see us eating healthy, kids learn that the people they respect the most – their parents – eat healthy. They learn how to eat healthy, since they see us grocery shopping and preparing foods. They learn what healthy is, since they see us do it. And they learn that healthy is normal. 

    Do your best to eat a variety of foods, include healthy options at each meal, and try new things. Don’t be afraid to let your kids know if you tried something and hated it. They’ll respect you for trying it, and they’ll know it’s okay to dislike something. 

    Tip: Be Calm

    Kids and dogs have a lot in common. For example, they know when we’re nervous. Don’t let your kids know how badly you want them to eat more or eat a wider variety of foods. They’ll make sure to hold out for junk food instead of caving into whatever healthy food you’re offering. Stay matter of fact, and if they choose to skip a meal, let it go. Unless their doctor is concerned, your kids are probably fine. 

    If you’re worried, a daily multivitamin and mineral supplement can provide micronutrients like iron, calcium, B vitamins, and more. Ask your pediatrician if you think your children should have one. 

    How do you get your children to eat a wider variety of nutritious foods?

  • My New Wireless Earbuds: Affordable Choice for Park Play, Music Sharing, and Work Calls

    My New Wireless Earbuds: Affordable Choice for Park Play, Music Sharing, and Work Calls

    Sometimes, a small purchase can make a big difference in everyday life. That’s the case with my new wireless ear buds. My old ones broke. Since I have been using them nearly every day, in many situations, I made it a priority to get new ones fast. I’ll use them while playing sports, making phone calls, and occasionally sharing a listen with my son, age 8. 

    There are so many nifty products out there, from tech-related items to household gadgets to clothing, accessories, and toys. Each one may be “just a few” dollars, but together, the purchases add up. It’s hard to tell which may be worthwhile, and which may be something that doesn’t improve your life. 

    Wireless ear buds can be a lifesaver if you work in an office and want to listen to music without disturbing coworkers.

    In this case, the $10 I spent are a good choice. Bluetooth, wireless ear buds let me listen while at the park and transition instantly to making phone calls or joining meetings remotely. They save time because I don’t have to fiddle with wires, and they let me have more “me” time because it’s easy to start listening at any time. 

    Battery and Other Basic Features

    These ear buds have features that appear standard for their price range. 

    • 8 hours of continuous playback or use time on a single charge
    • 48 hours of overall use time stored in the battery pack, or charging box
    • Easy bluetooth connectivity – they pair within seconds when I turn on my phone’s bluetooth setting
    • A mic with noise cancelling for easier phone calls

    I chose the red ones. As usual, I chose from the colors that were the least expensive. I was pleased to find red because my previous ones were black, and I found those hard to find. I also wouldn’t have wanted white because it looks dirty so soon. 

    Comfort Features

    These ear buds are designed to fit 99% of ears. They come with 3 different sizes of ear bud coverings so you can find the one that works for you. They weigh only 4 grams – that’s what a teaspoon of sugar weighs, to put it into context. Soft and comfortable, it’s easy to forget that you have them in your ears!

    Finger Tap Controls

    You can control the ear buds using finger taps. 

    Earbud Touch Controls
    Function Control
    Volume Down One tap, left side
    Volume Up One tap, right side
    Previous Track Long tap, left side
    Next Track Long tap, right side
    Answer Call One tap on either side
    Hang Up One tap on either side
    Voice Assistance Triple tap, left or right

    It looks like a lot now, but I know I’ll learn the various tap controls quickly as soon as I start using them. 

    Use Bluetooth ear buds to keep you company as you walk.

    Water Resistance: IPX7 Rating

    I’m satisfied with the water resistance feature. It’s sweatproof, drizzle-proof, and hopefully a little bit resistant to spills – after all, I’m not perfect, and I live with an 8-year-old. It’s rated IPX7. Here are the features. 

    IPX7 — What’s OK (✓) vs What’s Not Recommended (✗)
    OK (✓) Not Recommended (✗)
    ✓ Drizzle / light rain (walking, short outdoor exposure)
    ✓ Sweat during workouts (running, basketball, tennis practice)
    ✓ Accidental splashes (water bottle spills, playground splash)
    ✓ Short bursts of moderate rain if you quickly get under cover
    ✓ Submersion in water up to 1 meter for 30 minutes (pools, puddles, sinks)     		✗ Prolonged exposure beyond 30 minutes underwater
    ✗ High-pressure water jets (showers, hoses)
    ✗ Saltwater or chlorinated water over time (may damage seals)
    ✗ Extreme temperatures while submerged

    My Daily Uses for Ear Buds

    I use ear buds for active time, “me” time, parenting time, and social time, and work time. For safety reasons, I don’t use wireless ear buds for running. I prefer wired ear buds so I can use just one ear bud and have the other ear fully tuned to traffic and other potential dangers. But for my other listening purposes, ear buds work well. 

    I like listening while I do other things, so it’s convenient for me to have wireless ear buds that won’t get tangled up with my tennis racket, kitchen knife, or keys on a lanyard. Here are some of the times I regularly use ear buds.

    • Playing tennis against a backboard 
    • Shooting baskets alone on a court
    • While walking to and from supermarkets or aimlessly in the neighborhood
    • At home if my son is home and doing his own activity
    • In our building’s gym if someone else is present and I don’t want to bother them
    Find comfortable and water resistant ear buds to make running easier.

    One of my favorite ways to use them is to listen to my son’s playlist with him. We’ll each take one ear bud, and he’ll put on his playlist on my phone. I don’t typically like the music he listens to, but it’s fun listening together and knowing he handpicked each song. 

    Hopefully you got some insight or ideas for your own listening convenience. When do you use earbuds or a headset, and what features do you like to have? 

  • How My 8-Year-Old Decided to Be the MVP of Our Thanksgiving Team

    How My 8-Year-Old Decided to Be the MVP of Our Thanksgiving Team

    Thanksgiving is our family’s biggest holiday besides birthdays. By “big,” I mean it’s the one holiday we’re sure to celebrate. Our gathering is smaller than most people’s, usually including the four of us – me, my 8-year-old son, and my parents, who live down the street and host the meal. Compared to what I often hear from others, our Thanksgiving is less stressful. 

    We follow the spirit of Thanksgiving by putting higher priority on enjoying the holiday and each other than on serving an elaborate meal. While there are some must-haves, like turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce, we opt out of the endless parade of casseroles, pies, and other Thanksgiving fare many other families include. 

    For years, my son has been part of the preparations as much as possible for his age, interest, and abilities. He’s now 8. We all contribute to the meal in various ways. This year, he again took part in every part of the preparation, from helping prepare food in our home and at my parents’ house, to planning and executing table decorations, food service, and before-dessert games. Between his joy and his helpfulness, he’s the MVP of our Thanksgiving this year. 

    Thanksgiving Overview: How the Day Goes

    Thanksgiving starts out like most other day when my parents are in town. They walk to our place to pick up my son. I do my morning run and workout. My son spends the morning with my parents prepping food and planning the evening. I show up midday to help get the turkey stuffed and into the oven.

    There’s a quick clean-up, then my son and I leave for the afternoon to get outside and give my parents a break. We return for last-minute prep like decorating the pie and setting the table. Then it’s dinner time.

    Main Course: Turkey, Stuffing, and Vegetables

    My parents purchase and thaw the turkey, and buy the turkey bag for easy roasting. 

    Turkey prep starts in our home the day before Thanksgiving. I chop the vegetables for the stuffing, as well as the vegetables that go either into the turkey bag or alongside the turkey in the oven to roast. Onions and potatoes go into the turkey bag, and onions, carrots, and green beans roast on a pan next to the turkey. I also make a salad because I love salads. 

    The turkey is simple, delicious, and elegant.

    My son mixes up the stuffing. It’s always Mrs. Cubbison’s cornbread stuffing. That’s what my grandma used, and that’s what’s right, according to us! I bring the stuffing and vegetables over after my morning run and workout. 

    I get the turkey ready just after an early lunch. Then my son, my dad, and I stuff the turkey and put it in the oven bag along with onions and potatoes. We put it in the oven, and give my mom instructions on when to put the green beans and other vegetables on a pan into the oven later in the afternoon. 

    Pie Prep

    Thankfully, from the point of view of health and stress, we’re not big on Thanksgiving desserts. I don’t ever remember having a pumpkin pie, or any of the other typical fare like pecan pie or cheesecake that others may have. My mom has been known to make an apple cake or something else if she’s inspired, but we don’t have any “required” desserts. 

    My son and I have started making Cool Whip pies because they’re fun and easy. They’re guaranteed to taste good, and there’s no harm done if we decide not to eat the whole thing. Plus, they inspire creativity. 

    This year, we prepped a pie with white Cool Whip on the sides, and a purple Cool Whip “river” colored with blueberry yogurt and blueberries. The “river” included Goldfish, and the banks included green Hershey-ette “trees” “planted” in chocolate syrup “soil.” Pretzel rods formed a “bridge.” We made the pie base in our home the day before, froze it overnight, and finished decorating it on Thanksgiving at my parents’ home. 

    Thanksgiving Morning at the House: My Dad and My Son

    My dad and my son are like two lost brothers. They’re really quite a team. The morning of Thanksgiving, they make cranberry sauce from scratch, bake bread from scratch, and get out the fancy china and silverware that belonged to my grandmother. They get out the extra table for serving the food.

    We always have turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and vegetables.

    The table decorations are always a surprise for me. This year, they turned out to be seat markers on the back of each seat. They had our names and our numbers, which are the numbers my son has assigned to us as members of his imaginary baseball team. The centerpiece was a pumpkin decorated with a face drawn with gold and silver metallic pens.

    They also put the final touches on the plans for entertainment after dinner and before dessert. Previous years have included puppet shows, Lego demonstrations, and story telling. This year was a series of board games in a sort of tournament style. It’s always very well orchestrated, as my son pays remarkable attention to detail, and my dad has a remarkable capacity to pay attention and remember his role. 

    Fresh bread is always a treat.

    Post-Dinner: Clean-Up and Relax

    After dinner, my mom and I clean up. She clears the table, and I wash the dishes. Both of us enjoy it; we find it relaxing. During clean-up time, my dad plays with my son. He enjoys that; he finds it relaxing. 

    We’re all satisfied and pleased with the meal, and my son is proud of himself for a job well done. We’re grateful to have him make the holidays more special and meaningful.